Arise, envious sun, and kill the fair moon...

I really need to stop doing this; it happens so often now that I don't even realise until it's too late. Or, rather, too early. What I mean is this. It's now sometime after 3 am and I really only thought that it was almost-midnight. I must say, though, that this is the first time in several years that such has happened for the reason it has tonight; namely, that I got lost on the internet. Usually, it's because I'm in a Chapel somewhere, or at SBG, talking with Fr Martin and Br Gilbert.

I say that I need to stop doing this, but perhaps I just need to adopt a nocturnal lifestyle.
Or a semi-nocturnal one.
I could do "all-nighters" on Friday, Saturday and Sunday (or at least the latter two) and spend Monday recovering, in order to function well on Tuesdays.

It's when my mind is overtired that I stop filtering my thoughts and I believe that such a lack of filter is probably good for me to some extent. I don't know if everyone habitually stops their trains of thought when they get close to any topic that causes them discomfort or pain; I don't even know if anyone else does it. I know that I over do it.

You see, it is common  place for me to chose not to think about a certain topic because my inability to not-feel about it is diminished. Or, not diminished so much as nonexistent. And feeling is dangerous.

And I'm writing in sentence fragments.

Even thinking about that fact that I actively chose to not-feel about certain things is a train of thought I usually halt as soon as I am able. Such thought is too dangerous because it comes much too close to actually feeling.

Related to feelings:
I think a large portion of the reason I make friends with guys so much easier than with girls (have I ever wondered about that 'out loud' on this blog before?) is because guys typically show their feelings less. It is way easier for me to talk about abstract concepts than it is for me to talk about practical ways of doing things. However, the difference between the two types of conversation (in the order of difficulty) is almost minuscule when compared to the difference between practical-type conversations and those which revolve around feelings and emotions. (If such an occasion ever occurs, I tend to emote, rather than feel because emoting is further removed from my self.)

Yeah, so, I'm not comfortable with myself; I ought to be and I'm not. I ought to be because my Holy Guardian Angel is and he is an immediate expression of God's Love [x] and, since God is Love (1 Jn 4:8,) my Angel is an immediate expression of God's Self.

That last sentence is an immediate expression of my ability to write my best theology papers at this time of whichever day it is.

Anyway; if God is comfortable with me - or at the very least, deigns to be with me and provide for my every need, and many of my wants - I ought to be comfortable with myself. Yet, here I go again: I am taking a subject which ought to transform the way I live, act, think and (frankly) feel and turning it into an intellectual exercise.

Back to the being-friends-with-guys thing.
Guys don't typically need to have "How do you feel about that?" conversations all that often, at least when compared to girls. Moreover, when girls aren't like that, they are typically holding a "This is how I felt about it:" conversation. I dislike the first and find the second one draining.
Typically, too, guys seem better at comfortable silences wherein I can allow my mind to wander to not-feeling.

Further, although I don't think that me having a larger number of guy-friends than the other is problematic per se, I do believe that I need to learn to be more comfortable around other women.

There are, of course, a few notable exceptions to both parts of this 'rule,' none of whom I will name but all of whom I hope will both recognise themselves and tell me such.



I am not going to pretend that this post has been entirely coherent, but thus endeth the lesson.

Temptation

http://www.catholicmemes.com/not-impressed-2/padre-pio-not-imressed/

PLENARY INDULGENCE FOR THE YEAR OF FAITH

From http://www.annusfidei.va

Vatican City,  (VIS) - According to a decree made public today and signed by Cardinal Manuel Monteiro de Castro and Bishop Krzysztof Nykiel, respectively penitentiary major and regent of the Apostolic Penitentiary, Benedict XVI will grant faithful Plenary Indulgence for the occasion of the Year of Faith. The indulgence will be valid from the opening of the Year on 11 October 2012 until its end on 24 November 2013.
"The day of the fiftieth anniversary of the solemn opening of Vatican Council II", the text reads, "the Supreme Pontiff Benedict XVI has decreed the beginning of a Year especially dedicated to the profession of the true faith and its correct interpretation, through the reading of - or better still the pious meditation upon - the Acts of the Council and the articles of the Catechism of the Catholic Church".
"Since the primary objective is to develop sanctity of life to the highest degree possible on this earth, and thus to attain the most sublime level of pureness of soul, immense benefit may be derived from the great gift of Indulgences which, by virtue of the power conferred upon her by Christ, the Church offers to everyone who, following the due norms, undertakes the special prescripts to obtain them".
"During the Year of Faith, which will last from 11 October 2012 to 24 November 2013, Plenary Indulgence for the temporal punishment of sins, imparted by the mercy of God and applicable also to the souls of deceased faithful, may be obtained by all faithful who, truly penitent, take Sacramental Confession and the Eucharist and pray in accordance with the intentions of the Supreme Pontiff.
"(A) Each time they attend at least three sermons during the Holy Missions, or at least three lessons on the Acts of the Council or the articles of the Catechism of the Catholic Church, in church or any other suitable location.
"(B) Each time they visit, in the course of a pilgrimage, a papal basilica, a Christian catacomb, a cathedral church or a holy site designated by the local ordinary for the Year of Faith (for example, minor basilicas and shrines dedicated to the Blessed Virgin Mary, the Holy Apostles or patron saints), and there participate in a sacred celebration, or at least remain for a congruous period of time in prayer and pious meditation, concluding with the recitation of the Our Father, the Profession of Faith in any legitimate form, and invocations to the Blessed Virgin Mary and, depending on the circumstances, to the Holy Apostles and patron saints.
"(C) Each time that, on the days designated by the local ordinary for the Year of Faith, ... in any sacred place, they participate in a solemn celebration of the Eucharist or the Liturgy of the Hours, adding thereto the Profession of Faith in any legitimate form.
"(D) On any day they chose, during the Year of Faith, if they make a pious visit to the baptistery, or other place in which they received the Sacrament of Baptism, and there renew their baptismal promises in any legitimate form.
"Diocesan or eparchal bishops, and those who enjoy the same status in law, on the most appropriate day during that period or on the occasion of the main celebrations, ... may impart the papal blessing with the Plenary Indulgence".
The document concludes by recalling how faithful who, due to illness or other legitimate cause, are unable to leave their place of adobe, may still obtain Plenary Indulgence "if, united in spirit and thought with other faithful, and especially at the times when the words of the Supreme Pontiff and diocesan bishops are transmitted by television or radio, they recite ... the Our Father, the Profession of Faith in any legitimate form, and other prayers that concord with the objectives of the Year of Faith, offering up the suffering and discomfort of their lives".

So, MAKE USE OF THIS GIFT OF GOD'S MERCY.